Betrayal is the painful old pattern it is our challenge to overcome here+now. Physical, psychological, and spiritual backstabbing is the sanskara. A Sanskara is a mental impression - much like the groove in an old vinyl record or the rut of a field wheel - recollection or psychological imprint unconsciously manifesting in our current lives for resolution. Resolution is a firm determination, literally, to find another solution for so that it stops being a problem that requires a solution in our reality.
A sanskara of duality and two-facedness; a deep yet dim and long lost memory pieced together from faded fragments of broken promises; keeps showing up to be acknowledged in my reality as true. The Judas kiss. The PTSD trigger of deception, thunder crashing against the silent stillness, keeps demanding I hear it, refusing to pretend it is not here any longer. Ye olde double-cross.
The 3 Stages of Illumination...
In reality, there are no stages... no steps... There's really no where to go. To be honest, it's more of a spiral and you can walk inward toward contraction and then turn around and walk outward in expansion. Up or down, in or out, left or right, front or back, here or there, then or now, now or later. Nowhere and everywhere at once. None of it truly matters for it is a mere optical illusion. Energy contracts and expands. That's all energy can ever do.
The Dharma of energy is to expand and contract. The spiral walkway of being is not even a staircase. There is no climbing up. There is digging down. There is no front ahead and there's no back behind you. It all just is. A plane of existence where you can be; Without the anxiety over an uncertain future; without the guilt and shame over a youthful past lived fully and fully embraced. Knowing I am always willing to make many mistakes. And yet, what I've come to comprehend is that nothing is complete without a third dimension.
All is 3 things in one. No thing is whole without a third dimension. S p a c e is required for any and all things to exist, both inner and outer. Empty space is not nothing. It is a powerful something. Learn to see it. Next, existence of any thing requires a substratum, M e d i a, materia prima, earth mixed with water into clay, canvas and paintbrushes and paint ... something to create and work with. Finally, all things that are require i n s p i r a t i o n to unite and direct passion, focus, will, life, prana, chi, reiki, breath. Creation requires all 3.
3D Self Realization:
1D. The conscious realization that the absolute - the highest true consciousness - is real and the world as we know it is an illusion unconsciously created by our confused mind detached from our ever loving and innocent heart.
2D. The conscious realization that your individual true consciousness is not separate from the true consciousness of the absolute. This is when we hear the still silent whisper that convicts us by always keeping our truth safe and sound for us to see and hear when we are ready to release it into space, allow it to be, and love it as who we really are in truth - without having to pretend about anything because we are no longer afraid of losing any love from somewhere uncertain out there.
3D. The conscious realization that the world itself, and everything in it, including the space we cannot see with our human eyes, is infused to the core with spirit because spirit, or energy if this label makes your ego persona more comfortable, is all there is. Period. All that is. One and whole.
The Sanskrit word satyá literally means "true; truth, reality." Satyá is absolute. Satyá is not relative. Mathematics is the language of all cosmos - Fractal holography - Things in perfect relationship relative to one another. 100% no lying - the PRESENT participle of the verb lie -to present false information with the intention of deceiving. Satyágraha, the practice of truthfulness, requires a faithful commitment to fully embodying the truth and only the truth. To be 100% innocent here once more, consciously instead of unconsciously now.
Return to the clear, pure and clean consciousness of your true heart...Remember what it felt like to be a little innocent one, with nothing to hide from anyone and no secrets to keep in the depth of your body... remember when you had nothing to fear in the stillness and silence of your mind... remember when your heart was wide open and ready to fall in love with everything and everyone you happen to greet this day... courageously leading your way.
Free your soul, mind and spirit from this outmoded heartbreak memory recording-replaying technology. Break the sanskara, stuck in a memory rut like a broken record, on autoplay in your mind. Wipe the slate of your mind and heart clean with forgiveness and till the soil of your soul in peace. Burn all the weeds and branches that remain of this awful scar in your heart and scorch your inner earth. Give yourself a fresh new now... forgive the past and future, and allow yourself to begin again here+now. Recommit to your sweet intention to be true here and above all else faithful to your truth... Regardless of the challenge you may be facing right now, pick yourself up one last time, and choose to be the heroine your story has always been waiting for.
Sit today in the astonishing fire of your inner truth. Take your seat of honor at the center. Breathe into the discomfort of feeling your feelings in your body. Don't rush to your mid to distract yourself from your discomfort. Sit in the discomfort of being with only you. With all of your weaknesses; with everything you lack; with all the love that abandoned you; with all of the misunderstanding and the meanness you've endured; with all of the sadness you're hiding under your raging sea of anger; because of your broken heart. Forgive yourself for all of your lies and mistakes. Make amends where you can, yet first do no harm, to self or other.
Because you loved openly and truly. Because you trusted and gave it your all. Because you dared to dream and to hope, and you believed in yourself. You opened your heart and made yourself vulnerable by letting other in. See it. Feel it. Hear it. Crying deep within you in a place you're scared to look... whispering and waiting faithfully for you to return the warmth of your attention inward to shine upon your inner true self... is your innocent little one, unharmed and untouched, safe and sound, eager to love again in wisdom. Share your everflowing unconditional love with all, untie your heart wings and set your soul free. What are you waiting for?
What I have learned is that Satya also means Trust.
May I always sit by the illumined.
Om Namah Shivaya,
P.S. Please share your thoughts and comments below with me. I am practicing my writing and I hope to become a better writer. Namaste.